My First Nudist Experience
So there I was (as all good stories start) on a long weekend in NJ with a buddy who made casual mention that they have a nude beach there. Being the good Indiana boy I didn’t believe him as with as tight asses American’s are there is no way in hell they would allow a nude beach here in the states.
So, in true curiosity factor I told him we should go. I mean it was labor day after all with the forecast to be in the 100’s.
So long story short we make the drive over, parking lot was full so we hit a bar close by for a few cold ones and some nice blasting A.C.
After a fewish beers, we decided to try to make a pass by and if the parking lot was open yet. This is on Sandy Hook so there is a ton of beaches and they stopped allowing people in at like 1030 because parking was full.
We get in! Holy shit the thoughts and stories were flowing with abundance as well as the nervousness. Could I get naked on a beach in front of strangers? We parked, grabbed our coolers and headed down the board walk.
Talk about nervous. Holy shit, we were going to hit a beach with nude people. Is this like a big sex scene with people have sex all over the place? Were these chissled stripper like dudes walking around with erections? Are all the women of model type everywhere and I would have to worry about the previous comment 😳.
We hit the sand and I look left and there were probably a couple of hundred people all in bathing suits hanging out having a good time. My first thought “I told you there weren’t nude beaches you are full of shit”. Before I could say anything, my buddy says “Want to go play volleyball?”. Confused, I take a look to the right.
Holy sweet mecca of nudity. When I say it was packed, that is an understatement. There was no bullshit, probably 500-700 people naked, playing volleyball, enjoying the warm ocean, blaring music and having a good time.
.
As we make our descent into the abyss of nakedness to find an empty spot, I noticed on thing. The people weren’t even remotely close to what I had imagined. They were young, middle age, old, families, singles, couples, all races imaginable, fat, skinny, in shape, out of shape..you name it, they were there. Here is the mind blowing part, they were normal freaking people!
So we set up our camp of towels and crack open our first beer. Fast forward maybe 40 minutes of laying on the towel sweating my ass off and about 6 beers later (ok so they were Coors Lights to like 1/2 a good beer) and I had to pee. So I tell my buddy, after this beer I am all in. Fuck it I am stripping down naked and heading to the ocean to piss.
Now mind you we we are literally the only people wearing anything in a sea of naked people.
Out of place…yeah a little bit.
So the thoughts ran wild. How brave are these people. What are they going to think when I walk by. I bet the entire beach will come to a sudden stop and the waves will quit crashing and everyone will just stare at me, maybe I will get lucky and some lady will yell out “nice white ass mister”. I bet people are already talking shit about the “gwarker” that is dressed. What if
So the moment of truth came when I finished my beer.
I took a breath and said fuck it, and off came my trunks.
So there I was stripped down to nothing, just standing on my towel butt naked with 500 other people waiting for the show to begin.
But nothing happened.
Wait, no one stared. No one whispered to their friend. I figured it was a hoax and no one saw my 6’5 farmer tan frame, and as I walked down the ocean, then it would begin.
Get to the water, handle my business and turn to look…and nothing.
No one cared. No one probably even noticed me as they were minding their own business and having a good time.
They didn’t judge me (well probably as I was the creeper on a nude beach still clothed). I was just like them.
You know the entire time I was laying there on the towel making up stories in my head. My “What-If” game was strong that day. But when I finally said fuck it I am doing it, no one cared. No one talked shit and no one judged me. Why? I was doing the same thing as they were.
So to end the story we stayed for a couple of hours until we ran out of beer, stopped by the Marine pit and shot the shit naked with some old jarheads, drank some of their beer, got extremely intoxicated against my intent and went home.
So a couple of life lessons I learned that day on G-Beach in New Jersey:
1. Often in life we make up stories and have conversations in our heads. These stories control our actions, and if build big enough, will control our actions. Much of the time these stories are so fucking dramatized that it will generate anxiety and fear. Most of the time the story and conversation you had wasn’t even close to reality or what happened.
Question: How often do you build a story, or have self-conversation which lead to anger or fear and come to find out it wasn’t even close to how the real situation was.
Life Lesson: Pay close attention to your thoughts. Catch and control the story and conversation. You dictate it. Don’t allow it to grow out of control or it will control you for no reason. When they come, simply say “shut the fuck up, not today”.
2. Most people really don’t care about you or what you are doing. Sure there is a small select few, but in reality, most don’t. Hell, most will like this post without ever reading this far.
Question: How much of your time do you spend wondering what people will think of your actions, the decision you made or are about to make. Does it sway your actions because people will think differently of you?
Life Lesson: Don’t allow the thought of “what will they think if I do this” to stand in your way. Don’t hold yourself back because someone else. They aren’t you. They don’t live your life, they live theirs.
Live on your terms and what you will think of yourself and not what others will think.
Life is hard enough to live on your own, let alone worrying about what others will think. Everyone will always have an opinion of you, it is just if you value everyone thoughts or the one person that matters most: YOU.
I don’t want to sound rude so I will say this with the upmost respect, but fuck everyone else. IT IS TIME TO BE YOU FOR ONCE.
See ya at the beach, or the resort, or the lake, or the….wherever.
Ryan
P.S. I met some of the friendliest most legit people in my life on that beach. When you stand their naked talking to someone you don’t even realize it.
P.S.S. As a researcher it was important to establish and test my hypothesis: are people who don’t wear clothes actually that nice or was it a fluke east coast Jersey thing? To test this out I visited two other California beaches. My finding: People who don’t wear clothes on a beach are much nicer people and don’t give a shit what you look like, how much money you make, what car you drive, how big your house is or whatever else we tend to pride ourselves on. They actually just give a shit about who you are as a person
